Yopping Update #17 - shhhh, it is a surprise

Houlland is almost finished!   The rows are whizzing by. 

I started a new project, but it can't be revealed until after Christmas - so there is that.

I have been cleaning cupboards, and getting rid of things that are just taking up space and I never use.  I have four boxes for good will with kitchen stuff and books.  And I have a couple of boxes wrapped up with things to give to  others who will appreciate them more than I do. 

It feels good. 

I tore up all the old cupboard liners on the bottom pots, pans and tupperware shelves and when I get home from teaching on Wednesday I will buy some new shelf liner.  It will look SO much better when I am done. 

I haven't forgotten that Wednesday is Halloween.  I have the candy in the cupboard and a pumpkin to carve on the front porch.  I will be ready for the little trick or treaters.

It has not been an easy week and you can read about that in my previous blog post. 

Things are starting to shift in an upwards direction since a) writing my blog, b) talking to my sponsor, c) talking to my sister, d) following my daughter's suggestion to turn off my phone and have a good cry, and e) having a lovely evening with my niece and her husband and their four delightful children. 

Hugs from grand nieces and grand nephews are certainly healing.  So are hugs from their mother and father!  I got to read stories, play with star wars characters, and learn all about the different characters in 'Littlest Pet Shop'.  I have soooo much to learn as I embark on this grand-parenting journey. 

I also was told by the five year old that we HAVE to watch 'The Greatest Showman'.  Who am I to argue with that recommendation.

It looks like we have found a house sitter for our adventure in December and January so we are just getting the house in order to leave it in the care of someone else.  No easy task. 

Otis (our cat) knows something is up so he is alternating between being more skittish than usual, and friendlier than usual. 

So that is it for me.

I am certain other yoppers did more yopping and less fretting.  You can follow their adventures here.

Falling

Years ago I read a book called Learning to Fall by Philip Simmons.  I think it was in October 2003, the year I was diagnosed with a chronic illness.

You would think I would be better at it by now.

I'm not.

My anxiety has been stirred up the past few weeks.  I can't put my finger on the why of it.  The reality of it is a buzzing in my chest, butterflies in my stomach and a tingling in my legs.  Today, for example, I keep rubbing my legs to bring life to them - to reconnect my body to my limbs.

It is hard to explain.

It seems like life is piling itself upon me.  Our camper is in need of an expensive repair.  My car seems to be drinking oil.  I have so much to do between now and leaving for seven weeks to go visit my daughter.

I fret that I won't pack the right things.  I will forget something I really need.  I won't finish getting the presents ready to bring with me.

It's not like there aren't stores where I am going.

It's not like we have no money.

It's just anxiety rearing its head and tormenting me.

Everywhere I look there are things to do:  prep for teaching next month, packing, cleaning, sorting, repairing, raking, reading. Even my bookshelf is mocking me whenever I look at all the novels sitting there that I intend to read.

I can get it all done, I think, but I am not feeling well enough to tackle any of it and I am instead willing to just sleep, or watch TV and knit.

Not a very grownup way to deal with life, but it is all I have right now.

I did swim a mile on Wednesday - which helped in the short term.  I will swim again today.  Or go the gym.  Maybe both.

I have done the dishes, made the bed and the laundry is on.

I did finally get to the doctor for an on-going physical complaint and I hope the ointment she prescribed will do the trick.

I missed my Croatian lesson yesterday because we spent the day trying to get someone to look at some serious damage to our camper for which we do not know the cause.  So an insurance claim is in our future but I am worried they won't cover the costs.

I am worried my Croatian will not be good enough when I get there.

And on it goes.

'Call the waaambulance', I want to say to myself.

Take an orange pill and chill out.

I should have learned to fall by now.

Because I am falling.

But now? 

Now I will removed the novels I haven't read - write down their titles for future reference - and put them in the give away pile.

Then I will go to the pool.

There will be time.

My daughter said that to me once.

There is time.

Yopping Update #16 - Plugging away

Good Morning Yoppers and Yopper followers!

This week I have been plugging away on Houlland.  The rows are getting quicker and the repeated sections make the lace chart easy to memorize.

I am on the 2nd repeat of the lace section - down from 315 stitches to about 230 at the moment so the rows are going a bit faster.  Luckily all wrong side rows are knit only except the five stitches in the middle so that always gives some respite from paying too close attention while I am knitting and watching Netflix.

This week has been semi productive in other areas, and also unproductive.

Monday and Tuesday I was away teaching and when I got home I was so sooooo  tired that it was early to bed.

Wednesday was my birthday - so there was quite a lot of celebrating starting with brunch out and ending with dinner and a movie.  We saw A Star Is Born and it was wonderful  I highly recommend it.  I loved loved the Streisand/Kristofferson version so I had a bit of trepidation about this remake - but Oh My God it was so good.

On Thursday morning we decided to go get our flu shots and then I had my Croatian lesson.  Thursday night I went to a play with a friend and it was an early to bed night for me.

On Friday I was feeling the effects of the flu shot and just felt off all day - so very little knitting was had. I did get my hand-outs and supplies list off in the mail for a course I am teaching in mid-November.  The deadline is next Monday so I was happy to get this off my to-do list.

Saturday morning I was feeling better and headed to my CoDA meeting.  I was quite weepy when I got there but as usual had a bit of an epiphany as the meeting progressed.

I wore my "I'm gonna go down fighting" t-shirt to the meeting.  I even wore it backwards so the slogan was on the front, not the back.

Some participants shared about negative self talk, and I realized that my t-shirt was negative.  It should read:

I'm gonna get up fighting!  I came home in a better state of mind.

We were on a cleaning binge yesterday - getting ready to have someone live in our house while we are away in December and January.  We got a lot done and it felt good to clear out the cobwebs (literally and figuratively).

Last night we had a lovely dinner with my brother and his significant other.  Yummy food and lively conversation - we spent three and a half hours at the restaurant!

So, all this to say the knitting took a bit of a back seat this week - most evenings I managed about 6 rows.

Tomorrow I am off to teach 120 km from home.  I am listening to a fantastic book called "Pirate Cinema" while I drive.  It makes the time go by and I don't have to listen to the news! (Which is too anxiety producing these days.)

Wish us luck that the woman we are meeting tonight will want to house sit and cat sit for us while we are away.  It would remove so much worry to know the house is taken care of through the winter months.

Also, yesterday I voted in our municipal election. Here is my attempt at a selfie.  I am wearing my 'On the Spice Market' shawl as I am heading out to an Indian restaurant for supper so it seemed appropriate.

 Most people I voted for were elected so I am pretty happy about that.  Now we will see if their promises were more than just campaign strategy.

To follow other yoppers check out there progress here.

I am off to rake leaves while the sun shines and they are crunchy and easy to manage.  I hear the rains are coming back on Tuesday!

Yopping Update #15 - 63 or bust

Well, not only did I get all 63 points done (and before my birthday too), but I have picked up the 315 stitches and already knit 10 rows of lace.  The number of stitches gets shorter with every row - so this part may move along quite quickly.

It was Thanksgiving last weekend and my husband and I were by ourselves for the first time in forever.  So, of course, on Sunday we had to cook a turkey dinner with all the trimmings.

Needless to say we ate turkey every meal until Thursday night.  I even had turkey sandwiches for breakfast three days in a row!  I love turkey sandwiches. 

So that was my week. Knitting the Houlland shawl and eating turkey. 

Oh, and I may have become hooked on The Walking Dead.  Season two here I come.  No spoilers please.

And, as long as there is no zombie apocalypse in the coming week, I will be 63 years old by the next time you hear from me.  And even if there is a zombie apocalypse I think I will be ok because I have watched enough of The Walking Dead to know some tricks to avoid being bitten.  I am a survivor afterall!

To follow the other intrepid yoppers you can check out their progress here.

Yopping Update #14 - Wish Accomplished

Yes!  Bonnie's Wish is off the needles!!

and look how accurate my yarn usage was:

60 inches left over.  Yarn chicken FTW!

I still need to block this, and sew in the ends but SHE IS DONE!

I got a few more inches on my dear husband's sock.

And I picked up my Scottish Hap, Houlland, and have finished 8 of the 63 points I need before I pick up ALL those stitches and begin the body. 

I will be 63 in 10 days so I am taking it as a sign that I need 63 points for the border - I am aiming to have them done before my birthday. 

We had our first snowfall while I was working 120 kms north of my house.  Luckily it didn't stick before I had to drive home (and yes, the snow tires are going on next week before I drive up to work again)

There was a big enough dump of snow that the students could make snowmen at lunch time, but by 2pm all that was left was a few patches of snow and five or six snowmen like this one sitting on the green grass!


I had a few low days this week and yesterday I was having none of it.  I decided to walk to my twelve step meeting in the morning because the sun was out and it was glorious.  The walk, the meeting, and the walk home definitely helped my mood. 

Then my dear friend and I met for sushi lunch and afterwards headed to the pool to play in the river current, sauna, steam, hottub and talk and talk.  It was perfect and my mood has improved dramatically. 

She had to buy a bathing suit for our spa afternoon and she gave me this cute bag that her new suit came in:

I do feel good half naked (and all naked for that matter), but half naked and in the pool is always a win for me. 

It is Canadian Thanksgiving this weekend and for the first time in probably 41 years it is just my dear husband and me for dinner.  We have a little tiny turkey and we will make all the fixings. 

I am thankful for my family, friends, health and of course knitting.   And swimming.  What would I do without those two lifelines. 

To follow other yoppers you can check out their updates here.  I am off to brine the turkey and make some stuffing.  And yes, there will be knitting.

Have a great week everyone.