Friday, December 25, 2015

Christmas 2015

This is a Christmas I would like to forget, but will forever remember.

Here I sit, drinking tea, eating a mandarin orange, reading messages from friends on facebook.

Christmas came this year.  It always does.

The stockings were hung last night, and by some miracle they were filled by the Spirit of Christmas.

There have been many tears, but also by the Grace of God some laughter, some respite.

The sun shone today.  The days are getting longer.  Tonight is the full moon.

That all means something.

It all means something, but in this mysterious journey called life we cannot always know the answers or the outcomes.

This is the time for grief during a season of celebrating a birth.

These twelve holy nights will teach me something I need to learn.

Today?  Today I am learning what grief feels like, deep in my heart, deep in the marrow of my bones.

Tomorrow?

Tomorrow I will be open to what the day chooses to show me.

And I will probably go for a long, long swim.

Tu me manques.



14 comments:

  1. I am sorry that your Christmas was not all 'merry and bright' and wish that the new year will bring better days for you. xx

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  2. The melancholic full moon always pulls hardest on the heartstrings...Plus Christmas... This surely must be the nadir... Just keep swimming... Just keep swimming... And enjoy the loved ones beside you... Mwah

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    1. had a good swim yesterday with my son. two for one! mwah back!

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    1. Hope you are enjoying Christmas with your family.

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  4. As difficult a day as it has been, Grace has been present ... you got through the day and blessed be, you have been able to hear your Soul speak and write, naming the feelings, anticipating the future, hoping for the healing that will come. In time.

    My Christmas "read" this day has been a book by Mitch Albom (author of Tuesdays with Morrie and Five People You Meet in Heaven etc.). I love the way you write. I love the way he writes. I think you would appreciate the book I've just finished. It's called The Timekeeper. I got it from our local library and so anticipate you could get a copy from your library. In and through your post, I kept seeing/hearing/reading about "time" - that elusive Pimpernel. As the Twelve Days of Christmas unfold, so too will you. Sending you a gentle cyberhug my friend along with much love and a deep prayer and wish for peace within your spirit in the coming days.

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    1. your comment means so much to me. I will check out the book when I get back to town. Wishing you peace during these holy nights.

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  5. I am sorry that Christmas has been so very hard for you this year. I do hope and pray that things start to get better for you soon.

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  6. Big hugs, and Merry Christmas.

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  7. I'm sorry that Christmas was so hard. I hope the promise of brighter days will help - and the swimming. Keep on swimming.

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    1. today's swim was helpful, and yes, the days are getting longer. thank you for your support.

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I look forward to reading the comments. It makes me feel like I am not just posting into the void.